Communication with our children is vital to building the foundation that they need to fulfill their destinies in Jesus. Here are some phrases that I like to use with my children to encourage them, show them love, and role play good communication skills.
I liked the way_____________________
I'm glad you enjoyed learning_____________________
How do you feel about it?
You'll make it!
Knowing you, I'm sure_________________________
I have confidence in your judgment__________________
That's a hard one but I'm sure you will work it out
Thanks; that helped a lot
It was thoughtful of you to _______________________
Thanks I really appreciate____________ because it makes________________
You are really improving_______________________
Look at the progress you made____________________
You may not feel that you've reached your goal, but look how far you've come
I'd love to read your thoughts!
Sometimes the strangest things trigger the emotions. I haven’t been brought to tears thinking about him for a couple of months. My dad lived a long time, said he was ready for ‘the next chapter’, and died in May of 2015. I miss him so much. So, when I found myself in Walmart yesterday crying in the cleaning products aisle, it caught me by surprise.
Because of the distance from my home, I don’t shop at Walmart.
My biweekly long-distance visits to my father’s apartment included a nice visit, lunch, and a shopping trip to a local Walmart to purchase his needed prescriptions, groceries, and cleaning supplies. It became part of our routine, and continued for 7 years.
The memories flooded back while I was examining different types of toilet bowl cleaners. My tears in the middle of the crowded aisle drew stares.
One shopper continued to stare, but the others scattered. Maybe they thought I was contagious. I can’t blame them.
Who cries in Walmart? Everyone has a story.
Maybe the woman who continued to stare at me was praying for me. Maybe she has cried in the cleaning aisle.
I can only hope that I will always try to view others through love glasses, and not judgement or criticism. I hope that I will remember my temporary breakdown in Walmart and use it as a trigger to pray for others who don’t seem to be coping.
The Love Glasses are free but were purchased with a tremendously high price, the shedding of blood by my Savior. Looking at others with love, and praying for them is the least that I can do.
Thanks again Dad for everything. And thanks again Father God for sacrificing your only Son.
As moms, we want to do what’s best for our children. So, if the Bible, in Ephesians 6:4, says NOT to exasperate our children, we shouldn’t. But, what does it mean? What do we do and what don’t we do? I researched the word and the verse.
Fathers do not exasperate your children; instead, bring them up in the training and instruction of the Lord.
I am not a A type personality or a planner kind of person. Not a good or a bad thing, but it did become a problem for me after the birth of my second child. My firstborn did not need to be disciplined. He just didn’t do anything wrong. I thought it was because of my perfect mothering skills……..Ha! Then my second child was born, and by the time he was 6 months old, I knew I needed a plan to deal with his ‘curiosity’ and tendency to do things that he shouldn’t.
My husband and I came up with a list of non-negotiables for our home. We explained the list to our children, and talked about the points often. It made my life so much easier. I had less to think about. If a non-negotiable was compromised, and the child was willfully disobedient, I disciplined the child. Period.
Here is a scope that I made to explain them. What non-negotiables would you create for your household?
It was easy for me to trust God when no trust was really needed. I probably would not have admitted that, but after a traumatic event in our family two years ago, I realized it was true. All of a sudden I couldn’t control a bad situation, and prayer didn’t seem to be working. Where was my trust?
I remember looking at one of my young children and saying quietly to myself, “Wow, Johnny has a BIG problem with sulking. I’ll have to work on that.”
Then, just as quickly, as life screamed my name, amid the laundry, cooking, cleaning, nursing the baby, breathing…… I forgot that I should spend time working on Johnny’s attitude. Until, he sulked again. Then, I was mad at him, AND ME!
I decided to create a report card to help organize and strategize my attempts to equip my children with the tools that they needed to fulfill their destinies.
My report cards were divided into quarters, with the same 3 categories in each quarter.
I reevaluated the child’s progress after each quarter. Often, I could eliminate or tweak 1 or 2 goals.
My quarters were Sept. 1- Thanksgiving Day, Dec. 1 – Jan. 1, January and February, and March – Memorial Day.
Here is a sample of one of my report cards:
-How is their speech? Can they pronounce every letter?
-Can they run, jump, climb steps and perform other appropriate physical skills?
-Can they set and meet simple goals?
-Are they attentive as we share devotions? Do they seem to understand what we are reading?
-Do they understand what it means to pray? Do they pray?
-Are they kind? Considerate? Humble? Respectful?
-Are they learning how to demonstrate self-control?
-How do they respond to correction?
-Are they learning to be outward and God focused, as opposed to inward and self centered)?
-Can they choose to demonstrate a positive attitude?
-Can they follow directions?
-Are they learning to do things neatly?
-Do they complete a task or project after it is started?
-Are they learning to work independently?
I do not share the report cards with the children. The cards help me work with the children and affirm them as they improve.
If you aren’t following Kristen Welch on social media, I would encourage you to start. Her blog, We Are That Family, is informative, inspiring, and worth your time.
She is a Christian wife, mom, and author. I enjoyed reading both of her books, and was honored to be able to read her latest book, Raising Grateful Kids in an Entitled World, before its release today, January 26, 2016.
Before reading the book, I assumed it was written to help parents teach their children how to look at life from an outward, self-less perspective. It does that, in an easy to read, honest and transparent format.
What I didn’t expect was the conviction that I felt as I examined my own heart as I was reading. Without laying a guilt trip on it’s readers, Kristen gently helps the reader examine their goals, world view, and expectations.
I HIGHLY recommend that everyone purchase this book. I plan on using it for a book club which will meet at my home each month in 2016.